Pregnant Co-Worker

I have had a child. I know what it's like to be pregnant. I know what it's like to give birth and I know what it's like to be a mom.
Now a co-worker is pregnant with her first child and she is driving me FUCKING CRAZY.

HEADS UP, THIS POST IS MEAN, I KNOW!

First of all, stop referring to your fetus as the baby in every damn situation. Oh the baby is hungry, the baby wants to go for a walk, the baby went to dinner with daddy and I this weekend. Seriously? That shit creeps me out.

Secondly, we all ate weird shit when we were pregnant and we were all hungry all the time. I get it! I craved certain things, but I didn't eat shit everyday, and really you shouldn't either. You are eating VERY BADLY and it will start to show. Oh wait, it already has...onto Thirdly!

Thirdly your clothes are oh so tight! You are trying to fit a turkey in a Pringles can and it's not working! You need to buy new clothes! All that bad food you are eating is starting to show and it doesn't look good. I don't need to see your underwear lines or your back fat. Cover that shit up!

And lastly, please stop talking about how tired you are. I am tired too, I have a child (a crazy boy at that) and I seriously didn't even know what tired was until that kid popped out of my vagina. So shut the fuck up!

I realize that this post might offend people, it's really not meant to. I have been there, I was pregnant and hope to be pregnant again. I just can't stand these people I work with anymore and this one is really driving me nuts lately. She is definitely going to be that girl that registers for shit you don't need....like a wipes warmer. WTF!